Wolfe
by Ashke1
Summary: The inner reflections of Gabriel Wolfe


Title:  Wolfe 
    
    Author: Ash Kennedy (aka Noodles)
    
    Email: deadclinic@windiain.co.uk
    
    Rating:  PG
    
    Warnings:  cussing
    
    Spoilers:  Dark Visions 1-3
    
    Disclaimers:  DV belongs to L.J. Smith.
    
    Summary: The inner reflections of Gabriel Wolfe

  
In the study room, perched on the alcove seat, the storm-eyed Wolfe sat leaning against the window. He was alone, bathed in the orange glow of a sun dipping beneath his view of the horizon. But he could feel the presence of his housemates through the psychic mind-link he shared with them. A web, of sorts, that connected all five of them to each other, the very cords that bound them having been woven in desperation by his own mind. Thinking back, he couldn't understand why he had stuck his neck out like that. He supposed it had been the right thing to do but, ha, since when had he ever cared about the right thing? And now he wished only to snap those delicate mental cords between his teeth, to tear and rip what kept him so tightly bound to the others.   
But to do that would mean one of them would have to die. Despite how much he hated being in the psychic institute and around the other psychics, it was nothing personal. Well, it was with Kessler, of course. Still, he wanted no more blood on his hands. Not even the Golden Boy's. As frustrating and intimate as the situation was, he already knew how to keep the others from invading his mind, and eventually he would have his freedom. And then he would hitch somewhere warm and secluded and become nothing more then the ghost of a presence in the web. No death required.  
The rumble of his stomach pierced the silence, as well as his thoughts. His concentration was broken and he realized he hadn't eaten since the grilled cheese sandwich he'd had for lunch. Thinking it was just about the right time for him to show up late for dinner, he rose from the alcove like a predator stirring for the night's hunt and made his way downstairs.   
  
X X X  
  
Dinner had been surprisingly good. Roasted turkey, homemade stuffing, broccoli with cheese, and biscuits. He couldn't remember the last time he had had such good food, let alone homemade _anything_. He went back to his room wholly satisfied, slamming his door in the others' faces when they badgered him to come to the common room with them. He wasn't about to let them ruin the only thing he had enjoyed since he'd gotten there.  
Not the _only_ thing, actually. There was the fiery, witch-eyed Kaitlyn, made from the best stuff of his dreams. She was slightly a cut above the rest that lived at the institute, but that's _all_ she was. Besides, she had eyes for Kessler, and he wasn't going to go meddling into the territory of chocolates and flowers and good-natured boys. If that was what the girl wanted, then the fool could have the guy.  
Suddenly there was a knock at his door. From the place he'd chosen on the bed when he'd come in he hesitated. He could pretend he was sleeping or was out on the balcony, oblivious to whoever it was and whatever they wanted. But he found himself getting up and unlocking the door, yanking it open.  
Kaitlyn was on the other side.  
"Can I come in?" she asked him.  
He nodded and shut the door behind her, but inwardly he winced. The girl had certainly picked the worst time. If she had any idea of what he'd just been thinking he doubted she'd come in to his room so casually. He watched her with narrowed eyes as she took a seat on his bed, glad she hadn't turned on the bedroom light when she'd come in. The darkness hid the intensity of his gaze as he looked her over, the longing in it. Kessler's type of girl or not, he had to admit he was still attracted to her.   
"I know this hasn't been easy for you," she told him, "and we've been trying to leave you alone as much as we can. But we all have to think of _something_. We can't stay like this, or here. Not after what we've found out."   
He rolled her words over in his head, contemplating them. It was true they'd been keeping their distance, both psychically _and_ physically, but it wasn't enough. Outside of his room he couldn't escape the others. They were in the test lab, the study, anywhere he could go in the Institute. They never said more to him then the occasional 'hello,' to which he usually grunted back, but it didn't help the situation. Their presence in the back of his mind was constant, an ever-buzzing reminder that wherever he went from now on he would never be quite alone. Kaitlyn was right in that aspect. They couldn't stay linked like this.   
However, whatever Mr. Zetes was playing at with NASA and psychoactive weaponry was not the direst problem. In fact it intrigued him. It sounded like something that could make him disgustingly rich, if he didn't fuck it up for himself, and so he didn't share the concerns of the others.  
Kaitlyn shifted on the bed as she waited from him to say something. And when he didn't she sighed. He watched her shoulders heave, her chest rise and fall with the gesture, and had to look away.   
"None of us wanted something like this to happen," she continued. "Rob, Lewis, Anna, and me-- we're all going through as hard a time adjusting. I know it's not the same for you but it would help if you cooperated some."  
He laughed. It was a harsh, clipped sound that made Kaitlyn flinch. /_They/_ were having a hard time adjusting? Yeah, they were right that it wasn't the same for him. But they couldn't imagine how much harder it was. To be alone for most of his life, fending himself, living only for himself, then have not one but /_four/_ people piggybacking his thoughts. It was maddening.   
"I /_am/_ cooperating," he said, his voice edged with something sharp and ugly. "I've gone through every goddam book in this institute, and the library, and even school. I've pulled apart issues of the psychological journal to find a solution. And there is _nothing_ any of us can do short of kicking the bucket."  
"That's not what I meant."  
"Isn't it?"  
"You know it isn't. "  
He sunk down in the chair opposite the bed and leaned back, closing his eyes. She knew him too well, this one. Sometimes it seemed like she knew him more then he knew himself. Or maybe it was him just imagining it, wanting her to somehow have a deeper connection with him.  
"Alright then. Fine. What the hell do you want me to do?"  
"Talk with us. Or at least listen to what we have to say."  
"Why?"  
"Because whatever you may think, you're not in this alone."  
"And that's the problem, isn't it?" He sighed and opened his eyes again, locking them on her even though she couldn't see them. "Fine, not that it will help, but I'll try it. Don't expect much else though."  
Why had he agreed? For her? That was ridiculous. He could gawk at her, and he could dream of her, and he could want her with all his being, but outside of his fantasies, she meant nothing to him. None of them did. So why agree to talk with them? To get the witch off his back. Yeah, that's what he liked to think. But somewhere beneath the mental barriers he'd erected to protect himself, he knew there was more to it then that. He hadn't entirely stamped his feelings out. Beneath their ashes he could feel new ones stirring, wanting release. But he would hold them back. He would hold them back until he was far, far away from this place.  
Kaitlyn got up to leave, thanking and bidding him goodnight. "Tomorrow after school, we'll all have a talk," she said. "If you're not there, I'll come find you and drag you there." And she was gone.  
He smiled as he rose and crept out on to the balcony. Kaitlyn had balls, that was for sure. Something else he had to admire. It seemed his list grew longer every moment more that he knew her. He kept denying what he felt for her to himself, but his own thoughts betrayed him. Alright, so he /_did/_ like her. As a friend at least. Any idea that went beyond that he would ignore. It was dangerous to have such thoughts with the mind-web intact. Even with his walls there was a chance of being accidentally discovered.   
And that he could not deal with, with so much trouble stirring around him.  
Outside the moon was low in the sky, a bloated pale mass that looked like it could fall and crush him at any moment. The night air was warm and still, almost completely opposite of the New York nights he'd grown up with. In the distance he could hear the barks and growls of dogs, strays fighting over a meal or loyal pure breeds guarding against an intruder.   
And in his mind, Wolfe knew he was not much different then them.


End file.
